not too bad

so far so good. actually, quitting smoking hasn't been as hard as i thought it would be. I'm only on day 4 and I've cheated a couple times due to alcohol induced peer pressure. but I've gone 3 full days at work with no smoking and I woke up this morning without a craving at all. However after cooking breakfast, cleaning the kitchen, changing 3 diapers, feeding a crying baby and making a grocery list, I need to chew a piece nicotine gum. It doesn't sound so impressive "3 full days at work with no smoking." but it's a milestone for me. I have used smoking as an excuse to take minor breaks from work ever since I have been in the workforce. I've never known another way to work. My days have been based around 2 hour intervals. I make plans for the next two hours or the next few tasks that need done. Then I say to myself, "ok, after I get this done, I'll smoke a cig, and decide what need to be done next." In the past 3 days I've had to change the mind set instilled in me over the past 18 years. Not exactly an easy transition. So what have I done to accomplish the first 3 days? I've kept busy. I started assigning myself smaller, less complicated tasks. I do one thing at a time and then move on to the next. It actually makes the day go by a little faster. I also stopped reading/watching/listening to the news. Granted I have no idea what's going on in the world, but maintaining my encyclopedic knowledge of the world's happenings became very stressful. I'm sure that the republicans are still trying to figure out which tax-cutting, moose-killing confederate will be accepting their nomination. And I'm sure the democrats in the White House are still trying to figure out what the hell their doing there in the first place. Still wars in the middle east, booming economic times in China, Greece falling apart, Gadhafi missing, Lindsay Lohan on trial, Christina Aguilera naked, Transformers 3 at the top of the movie charts and Lil Wayne pissing Kulifay off. If I'm wrong about any of that, you can just take it as proof that I haven't looked at a news feed in 4 days, if I'm right, you can take it as my genius foreseeing the future with clarity and focus. So I haven't watched the news, I'm staying busy, what else? I'm eating less. Yeah, you heard me. I find that whenever I eat, I want to smoke immediately after. So, if I don't eat....or eat smaller meals, I don't feel the need to let the nicotine settle my stomach. My girls have been very patient with me. I can tell that Jackie is biting her lip sometimes because she knows I'm already hanging on by a thin thread. But that's it for now. I'm sure it's going to get more complicated with my fantasy football draft on monday and the nfl regular season starting next weekend....especially the steelers vs. ravens game next sunday. but I'm just going to keep taking it a day at a time.

So I feel good today. We'll see where it goes from here.